原谅我一次

Sorry for appearing in your life.
Sorry for turning your life upside down.
Sorry for causing all these unnecessary heartache.
Sorry for landing you into this state.
Sorry for wasting your time.
Sorry for taking up so much time to decide.
Sorry for the answers I gave.
Sorry for all the memories because it never fails to make your tears drop.
Sorry for every single thing.

But, I never wanted all these to happen.

I need a break.

Having a bad headache these few days, can't really think well.
It gets worst when I start to think about things.
Panadols and medicine only stop the pain for awhile, what is happening to me? -.-

Been stressing alot of things lately, some things that are meant to be kept secret.
All these stress adds on to my headache, fuck this.
I really need to go on a great escape, to somewhere I have never been before and with unfamilar faces around me.


Loonloon's still inside, I really really hope he's beside me listening to my every sorrows now.
I hope he's fine inside, please behave yourself.
I know I don't have the needs to tell you all these because you are matured enough.
You never once get me worried for you, you do your things properly and don't need me to nag at you.
Alright, i'm going off to write letter for you after this post.

Gonna sleep soon, need to attend some stupid and lame things tomorrow.
Fuck you bitch, you really should fuck off and die.
Stop testing my patience, I will really screw you up and make your life miserable if you go over my limit.

至少走得比你早

Sorry for the lack of updates, I finally get to touch my computer and so here am I.
My blog is seriously rotting. I'll upload more photos and less words in case my blog gets too wordy.
Agree? Hahaha, alright alright.

Here you go! :)

Yy sissy.

Freedom.

Pearlyn doing siao siao things again...

Hello and good morning all. Surprise to see me blogging at this time right?
Yea, I'm still not yet asleep so I can't be awake, laughoutloud.

Was out with Pearlyn, Vincent, Cheeming and Eugene recently.
Fun and interesting, unlike days when I'm attached~
The thought of me being single now just brighten up my day.
I can do whatever shit I want without people's comment and don't have to tolerate other's nonsense.
Definitely enjoying every single moment being single.

Hahahaha, okay okay. I think I better stop here before I go crazyyyyy.
Off to sleep, good'night' people.

Bye! :)

Dedicated

I always wanted you to care for me more in the past.
I yearn to be the girl you loved most.
Therefore, I did everything I can to be the girl.
Now, I'm sick of trying over and over again.
Sick of pulling strings attach..

After some time,
I no longer yearn to be the girl you loved most.
I no longer want you to care for me more.
Because, I am no longer the same old me.
No longer your dearest babygirl.
Inside me, I was thinking, what's the use even if you promise you'll do better now?
What's the use of promising me all these when I chose to leave?
If only you did tell me all these earlier, everything would be fine now.
For these past 6 months, all I wanted to hear so much is you to tell me I'm your best.
But, after so long, I never hear it before. Not even for once..
Even till the day we part, I never got the chance to hear it.
Till yesterday's night, you finally told me.
By right, I should be happy. But, I don't know why, I feel nothing.
After a while, sadness overwhelmed me. I thought, I was suppose to be happy, right?
But, instead, I feel wasted. Wasted because that sentence came too late.
I was once a bad girlfriend, I didn't treat you good.
I shouted at you as and when I like, I only pamper you when I feel like it.
I know about all these, I still remember.
But, I remember me changing for you as the time goes by.
And, when I finally changed for the better, you started to take changes too.
You said I always wanted to win in a fight, I would always argue till the end.
You said I never know how to apologise.
So, the fight continued and we broke each other's heart.

Slowly, I changed. I always keep quiet during a fight, I always apologise even though I don't know where I go wrong.
I just told myself, this is the kind of girl you want, so be it.
I'll change myself, to someone you're comfortable with, to someone who will never break your heart.
But, you told me you don't like me being like this.
I was lost, I don't know what to do.
When I argue back, you said I always wanted to win.
When I keep quiet and remain silent, you said I changed and no longer cares.

Over the past 6 months, all I ever wish for is actually your understanding for me.
Even though if you never once tell me I'm the girl you loved most but it doesn't matters as long as I have your understanding.
But, I never once feel it.
I always told you to put yourself in my shoes, I wonder have you ever try that.?
Well, I did. Because I put myself in your shoes, that's why I tried to change to someone you liked, someone you prefer.
If I didn't think for you, I wouldn't change myself. Instead, I'll ask you to accept me for who I am.


Right now, it's pointless to say all these anymore.
It's all over and we got to get on with our life eventually.
Goodluck to you on Monday, hope nothing happens.

Dear God,

Went over to Boonlay yesterday and met up with Tianlong, Janice, Ahleong buddy and Jiajia.
You An was there too, and so was, Jin he.
Same old things, see them play billiard, number ball etc.
Feeling unwell the whole day but Buddy ask me to ton because You An is going to Taiwan for 2 months plus soon.
Well, I did. Planned to go home change and sleep at Tianlong's chalet, but, I overslept and woke up only at 11pm plus.

Still having headache and sore throat now, damn it.
Going off to rest after this post.

Goodnight all, muacks! :*

How I miss someone to hold, when hope begins to fade.

This 2 pictures above was taken 2 years ago.

Take note of the difference in hair length.

Yixin and Pearlyn. :)




I'm down with a fever. My shoulder is aching badly.

I haven't eaten anything since last evening, no appetite in anything.

May god bless me. -.-"